Saturday

is it even normal?

Bunch school stuffs around me lately. That freaking stuff keep bugging me like I'm gonna run away from them. Which was true, if only I could, I'll disappear and never coming back to where I was. But reality bites. There's nothing such disappear and never coming back. We have to face the fact and bite it back.

Of all the crap, crap, crappy years I've ever had in the whole of my crappy life. on a scale of 1 to 10, this year...I could scale it on minus 9. YES. -9. From 1 to 10 it's -9. For the fate-writer's sake. Let me out from this year. It's not like I even have very high standards. But this year was too crappy for me to living it right.

Perhaps, if I behave as though this is a completely normal situation, then maybe it will be... I'm good at pretending. Most of the time I can pretend to enjoy everything. I was pretty fine with that stuff. But at this precise moment in time I'm totally fed up with that. I've had more than enough. They're trying to change me into someone else. To a whole different person of me. And I'm afraid I couldn't bear them. All the joy get sucked out of me and left me pounding and wanting something I cannot have and even forbid me to have a little imagination about it.

Despite of thinking about the pain and sorrow and stuff, I keep eating and eating like a huge bear starving for something he couldn't find and end up eating everything he could see. So, stop asking me reason of my weight-gained, or why do you always see me chewing something. I blame the Universe for making me gone wild.



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